They’re here…kind of!

Only two baseball games on tap for today, so there won’t be mu…hey wait a minute! Two baseball games?  That means we had two ties atop divisions and will now have a couple of one-game tiebreakers to decide who gets into a real series and who gets stuck in a one-game playoff.  And that, my friends, is why a 162-game schedule isn’t too long after all. Brewers at Cubs at noon (I’m picking the Cubs) and Rockies at Dodgers at 3 (I’m picking the Rockies). The losers face each other in the wild card game (at Milwaukee or Chicago) and the winner of the first game will face the winner of the two losers while the winner of the latter will face Atlanta in the divisional series. Sound confusing?  Here’s a primer on how it all works.

Your NFL winners so far were: the Bungles!, da Bears, the Cowboys, Green Bay (in hideous throwbacks), Tennessee, Houston (after an inexplicable decision by Frank Reich), New England (let the hype machine return), Jacksonville, Oakland (sorry Cleveland), Seattle, Nawlins, San Die-er, the Los Angeles Chargers, and Baltimore (write off the Steelers).

The big game of the week in soccer ended in an entertaining draw as Liverpool and Chelsea both remain frontrunners for the title along with Man City.  Man United are officially in a state of disarray with Mourinho and his players publicly airing their grievances amid a 3-1 loss at West Ham.  The team is inexplicably standing behind him.

 

Well that was exciting!

And there was a great college football game Saturday night. No, not the Domers, who dominated Stanford. You all know who it was and you know what a roller coaster that was for me and a few others on here.  Anyway, that felt fantastic. Here’s the recap.

Today’s birthdays include: outlaw Bonnie Parker, aviation pioneer William Boeing, acting great Walter Matthau, beer deregulator Jimmy Carter, singer/actress Julie Andrews, rocker Jim Martini, baseball great Rod Carew, off-his-meds actor Randy Quaid, gutless flake Theresa May, juice fanatic Mark McGwire, and actress Beer Larson.

Its also the day on which Alexander the Great defeated Darius III at Guagamela, Siemens AG was founded, “Das Kapital” was published…by capitalist swine who used their printing press, which costs money to use and maintain, “Little Women” was also published, the first National Geographic his the shelves, T.E. Lawrence captured Damascus, Babe Ruth (allegedly) called his shot, Chairman Mao declares the Peoples Republic of China (50 million Chinese will not get the chance to join him in the celebration), “Honeymooners” made its small screen debut, Johnny Carson made his “Tonight Show” debut, and the (worthless, money-sucking) Department of Energy was established.

That’s it for all the silly stuff. Now on to…the links!

I’m sure Trump is shitting his pants knowing he’s negotiating with this guy.

Canada comes back into the fold as NAFTA agreement reached. Unsure if the first thing to cross the border after the deal will be Trudeau’s balls in a Fedex box, but that’s what I’m hearing from unnamed sources familiar with the deal.

If this is disqualifying for someone being on the Supreme Court, then we are officially entering some kind of Puritanical hell for a free society. I mean…the last four Presidents have had (in reverse order) a slew of women he had admitted affairs with, used cocaine in high school and sold pot with his “chum gang”, had a notorious drinking and drug problems, has been accused of several sexual assaults and had his wife go after the women who happily slept with him during his impeachment trial for perjury.  Seemingly only one of those pasts matter to the media, who are doing their job as DNC mouthpieces with aplomb. Little do they know how many good people this will drive from ever wanting to “serve” the public.

City governments sue the federal government for wanting people to be taxed less. That’s pretty much it. From the article:

“It’s monetary, but it’s also a protest,” Ms. Paulin said. “I worry that the changes to SALT are going to destroy our way of life in our state, and I want to be part of an effort to preserve that.”

Then keep donating your own money, lady (which she is). And stop trying to get your local and state government fat on the fruits of labor of middle class and poor people.

California’s government, long known for some of the stupidest shit ever, actually gets one right. I mean they really get this right.

Instead, under the new law, a suspect can be charged with first-degree murder only if he or she was the actual killer, solicited the murder or aided the slaying in a way that showed a “reckless indifference to human life.” The law will allow those who have been convicted under the felony murder rule to petition a court to be resentenced.

Wait for it…….

There is one notable exemption: any case in which a police officer is killed.

Son of a bitch.

I will be shocked if he takes the stand. I also hope the judge finds a way to clear the courtroom. Not completely, just of the scores of uniformed cops who will be sitting right next to the jury box staring holes through them. Because that’s what always happens when a killer cop takes the stand.

Kanye West knows how to stay in the news. And the dumbasses keep taking the bait.

This will not end well.

How long before one of these clowns gets shot? Literally. Either way, I laughed.

Let’s get a little funky this morning, shall we?

Now go have a great day!