Long ago, in a galaxy far, far away. No, wait. Wrong story.
Let me start again.
In a former life, I was the owner of a hard-won and extensive set of healthcare credentials issued by the State of New York, and some other granting agencies and organizations. After I left NYS, I decided not to continue in that line of work and consequently did not transfer my credentials elsewhere to keep them active. This turns out to have been a huge miscalculation.
For reasons too mundane and numerous to list, I’ve now decided that perhaps I want to get back into a very narrow segment of the field. The very specific skills and knowledge needed are ones for which I was universally lauded, and were a tiny portion of my previous scope of practice.
Looking around at various job openings, I see that I am very well-qualified…except I don’t have the standalone piece of paper now needed for this.
OK. So, how can I obtain the piece of paper? Take a certification exam. Excellent. I kick ass on certification exams, and my skills and knowledge are more than compatible with the current standards. I can do the work and can pass the exam, I should be able to get the gig.
Nope. Can’t sit for the exam unless I have a different piece of paper from an “approved” program, attesting to my successful completion of a certain number of hours of training under the accredited program, the curriculum of which I could actually teach…and, in fact, used to teach in NYS.
But, OK. I get it. This isn’t too different from the first time around. I’ll find a program at a college and enroll.
Within a day of applying to the closest institution of higher education offering the required program this autumn, I was accepted. Awesome, no?
No.
I received a packet of information via email with the requirements that must be met before I can even register for the specific courses needed for the credentialing program.
WTF? I can’t register for the courses even though I was accepted?
No.
First, I must attend an orientation session for the program. Well, that seems OK.
There is only one offered this entire summer for a program beginning at the end of August. Still, I’m thinking, good thing I found out about it in time! I’ll sign up for it.
Nope. No reservations or sign-ups taken, even though there is limited seating. But if you don’t get a spot in the room, you are out of luck until…next summer!
OK, so I’ll add it to my calendar, make some arrangements that are disruptive to the entire household, and will make sure I am there a couple hours early.
In the meantime, let’s take another look at the list of requirements and see what else I can check off.
*double take*
They want…my ACT and SAT scores and high school transcripts? I graduated from high school in the early 1980s (and they know this), and I took those exams my junior year of high school. Why in the world would they want those?!
To prove “English proficiency” and “Algebra readiness.”
Now, I am a regularly published writer and professional editor with tear sheets, books, and lists of credits. I took higher math (unavoidable with a math professor dad!), but there is absolutely no math, and indeed, very little arithmetic, needed in this field. WTF?
You guessed it, my Glib friends! Turns out those are some kind of government mandate. Being a published writer in English language magazines is not considered “proof” of English language literacy. Why? Because that isn’t on the list from the government.
(Digression. High school guidance secretary, after several email exchanges: What was your name when you were here again?
Me: Same as it is now.
Secretary: Um…ok, I was…um, just checking. I’ll have to get back to you.
Me: *head desk*)
Ever dealt with the SAT and ACT folks trying to get nearly-40-year-old records? Gee, I have now. I don’t recommend it. Expensive. And takes weeks longer than I have to obtain the results.
Because, remember, I can’t register for the courses before I get this info. Oh, and, hey, there is only one section of this program being offered at a time I can take it. And, “don’t delay on sending in your requirements as courses tend to fill quickly.”
(I hear you wondering, “Why can’t she just use her college transcripts?” Because in the honors program I was in, we could design our own curriculum and neither English comp nor math had any place in what I was studying so aren’t on those transcripts.)
Well, this is silly. I’ll research in what other ways I can “prove” these things.
Turns out I can take placement tests. Seriously. Well, OK, if I have to, I can do that sooner than the other stuff will arrive.
Except. That costs money. And the tests can only be done supervised, on-site. During limited hours which are, again, household disruptive. With an appointment that is weeks out, really pushing my registration window.
Hmm. Before I spend any more cash, I better call the program chair and find out if there are even any openings in the course sections for which I need to register.
“We don’t really know.”
“Isn’t it shown right there in the computer roster?”
“Well, things change a lot over the summer, so we can’t really know right now. I would advise you to keep going through the process and then try to register.”
Back to the damn list.
Proof of Residency. Check!
Proof of Citizenship. Two for two!
New student orientation. Crap. “NSO will teach you how to succeed in a college environment!” At least as a “non-traditional” student, I will be able to complete this as a series of webinars. With tests for each section and a final exam which must be passed with over 70% correct answers. Truth. Could I make that up?
Meeting in person with academic advisor in counseling center. Really? For a certificate program? Yes! Mandatory, because it additionally grants college credit. Daytime hours, limited for summer, no appointments.
Required tests and/or immunizations for healthcare programs, which must be done at the institution’s health center (yes, limited, daytime hours):
TB 2-Step (9-day process) $9 ea
OR T-Spot (1-2 Business day) $54 ea
Hepatitis A Titre $22 ea
Hepatitis B (series of 3) $46 ea
Hepatitis B Titre (quantitative antibody) $35
Hepatitis C Antibody $22
Measles (proof of two) $78
Measles Titre $35
Mumps (proof of two) $78
Mumps Titre $52
Rubella (proof of two) $78
Rubella Titre $17
Varicella Titre $46
Tdap $46
Flu Shot $35
Notice something about many of those? If the titre doesn’t provide a satisfactory result, the shots are needed. They are mostly series. Which must be spaced out by several weeks. Which takes me out of the registration window completely. (Did I ever have rubella? Doubtful. Can’t ask Mom, she rudely died a few years ago, not anticipating the inconvenience to me now.)
Physical Exam (price varies)
Eye Exam (price varies)
Drug Screening – 10 panel, $50. Must be paid first at college cashier’s office after standing in line (daytime only hours, “limited for summer” !, then paperwork and receipt delivered to program secretary’s office, who will then issue the paperwork (“within 3 or 4 business days, but not Fridays during the summer”) to take to an off-site, non-local provider, with…yes, you know it, limited daytime hours, walk-ins only, no appointments.
Sheesh. This is starting to add up. Oh, yeah, and I have to pay for all this stuff before knowing if I’ll get a spot in the program.
Back to the list.
Fingerprinting $28 – outside vendor, not local, limited daytime hours, walk-in, no appointments. *sigh*
Background check $45 (Did I remember to list every address I’ve ever had?)
Healthcare Provider CPR/AED – off-site through AHA. This one, at least, will be easy to meet as the classes are routinely scheduled for evenings and Saturdays at loads of local venues.
Oh, look! Here’s another little wrinkle. This program is only offered with an August starting date. All the above requirements have to be met within 12 months of beginning the program in August. If I go ahead and pay for everything, get all the documents and tests completed during July to increase the chances of being able to register before the program is filled, and ultimately there is no space in the program this autumn…I have to do it all again to try to get in next year, because July is not within 12 months of next August.
But, hey, that’s the end of the list!
There is a cheery little message at the bottom:
Notification will be sent to your email account when you have been granted permission to register for the program courses. If you have met all other program requirements, you will be able to register for any section that has availability, as long as the registration window is still open. Remember: enrolling in one course does not mean you will be able to enroll in the other courses required for the program. You may have to register for those courses during a later program year.
TL:DR – I’m beginning to see why there is a shortage of healthcare workers, yo.
I FUCK’N HATE BUREAUCRACIES!
Choir.
Thanks for writing this.
And this kind of situation is the root of corruption. At some point, it becomes simpler and cheaper to ask the person who has to verify all this, “What’ll it cost me to get all the check marks without the hoops?” You pay the bribe instead of going through the process that is the punishment.
Yes. I push back on security crap all the time at work because the harder you make it to comply, the more likely people won’t comply and find ways to cut corners.
I have long argued that Mexico is more “democratic” than the US.
If you have a simple car title problem in Mexico a few dollars will make it go awau.
In the US it will be much more expensive and time consuming going through the official process.
Im Mexico all classes of people are allowed to bribe government officials but in the US only wealthy people can bribe high level government officials.
During one of the meetings I managed to get to, that thought crossed my mind. “Too bad it’s not a guy in charge. I have nothing I can do for this straight chick.”
Thousand of little Eichmanns.
Was it Rothbard who said that a greedy bureaucrat is much more moral than a petty one?
What if you’re triaging X patients who each have Y wounds and you have Z hours until the building collapses? Do you mean to tell me that you’ll be able to handle treating them without algebra? You make me sick.
I’m sorry you’re sick, but I can’t help you as I don’t have the right piece of paper.
*thunderous ovation*
This is why I married her.
My bet is that her algebra is just fine. Just as hew writing is just fine. It’s not about ability. It’s about limiting access.
I don’t know why you’re complaining, would it be better if the colleges could decide what prerequisites were required?
Then you’d have unqualified people failing out, but being given the cert anyway so the college could make an evil profit.
This is just the government(which is all of us, obviously) looking out for the little guy by stomping on him.
Or, crazy thought, how about whatever health care company that needs her services spend a few minutes talking to her to figure out if she knows what she’s doing, then runs her through a practical test?
You know, free market.
That’s just crazy, how can you ensure the company doesn’t want to kill its customers without that useless piece of paper?
Not to mention that the test is probably both racist and sexist.
Fucking supreme court.
the test is probably both insufficiently racist and sexist
FTFY. Entrance exams must be weighted by candidate’s skin tone, because we’re all equal but some of us need our equality affirmed by fiat.
When I first went to college, I had a small student loan. I dropped out, got a job and paid it off. Then I went back to college while working full time and didn’t take any loans. Before I could graduate, I had to go to loan counseling because of the first student loan. I took time off work, went to the registrar and showed them my paperwork showing I had paid that loan off. Nope, still must attend loan counseling. Which required me to take more time off. So, I went and it was basically repeating, this is a loan, you have to pay it back for an hour and a half.
At the end I walked up to the presenter and said, “so, I don’t have to pay this back right?”
Well played..
Revenge is all you have left when the system tells you that no matter what they need you to bend over and grab your ankles.
Ha! I love that.
I hope there’s Damn Good money at the End of all that,
/Good write up to a Sad Tale of Red tape Hell
I’d make more as a Chicago public school teacher.
But you would lose your soul.
I sold my soul for a paycheck.
I don’t miss it.
That bites. 🙁
Yes, yes, it does.
Your background check could turn out worse, SP.
I am little worried they will find out I run this site.
So, Ms. SP, could you tell us a little more about your acquaintance with this Steve Smith fellow?
For what it’s worth, even reading this was infuriating.
Fun stuff, SP! My wife is currently fighting with her PTA program because after doing ALL of that fun stuff — and I guess needing a 2nd TB test before she goes for year 2 in the fall — her BS in Psychology from a Florida University is not accepted as having met the requirements for having the one psych course she must have credit for before she can graduate. Florida has had a state education compact for over 10 years — every course taught at a Florida public institution must transfer. She also has an AP credit that would count. Her AP experience sounds like your HS experience. God forbid they let someone out who might not have this ancillary requirement met just so.
Now, if she only had bothered to get a graduate degree in psychology….
Hush your mouth! If she must be a permanent student, I much prefer the community college rate.
PTA = Physical Therapy Assistant?
Your wife should go talk to the program head, or the Dean. every policy has a way to get an exception. The Florida articulation agreement (which goes back to the early ’90s) only applies to undergraduate courses, but it seems like they still could substitute this undergraduate degree for the requirement. Unless it’s an accreditation issue–even then you can usually make exceptions as long as they are documented and justified. A lot of programs will tell you that their accreditors REQUIRE x, but when you go and actually read the standards (which are almost always online somewhere) the language is much more general.
I have suggested the same. She’s trying to avoid a face-to-face official petition-for-credit. Don’t ask me why. Mostly because she swears she has the credit, she was formerly an academic adviser at FSU, and by God she is IN THE RIGHT!
Me: Do you want to be right or do you want to be a PTA?
She is still on the fence about the answer to that.
That was more to go through than when I enlisted in the Army. And still less, when some years later I got commissioned as an officer.
ABSURD.
…and I suspect there are plenty of statists out there who would insist your field is under-regulated.
Oh, most definitely. Someone mentioned in one of these meetings that it seems that “just anyone” can get into the program.
I love responding to people like that by accusing them of being elitists (as long as I won’t have to work or otherwise interact with them letter).
Yes!
This was a “potential future participant” in the program saying this. I hate to tell her what “kind of people” she’s going to be working on if she gets into the program.
Oh well, in that case, you stare at them and say “apparently”.
I turn 62 next year. I thought: what if I retire as an engineer and go teach high school math and science. Summers off. That might work. So I looked into getting the accreditation. There is a program for people with non-teaching degrees and relevant work experience in critical areas (say math and science). Only 12 grand in fees and year and half in classes. Then you can teach high school. Fuck that.
It’s all barriers to make the club as hard as possible to get into without owing someone a favor.
See my similar story below.
In some states you don’t need a certificate to teach in private schools. I taught for a year at a private high school in Florida and have never taken an education course. I did have a PhD in my subject area, which helps.
I second this. I taught for a year at a private high school without any education courses and only a bachelor’s in a course-adjacent field (BS in engineering, teaching math). Of course I was technically a long-term substitute, so there may have been some rule bending going on in my case (it was Maryland, which is not exactly known for its light regulatory touch).
Kinnath, you dont want to teach. You dont want to set foot in a HS. Trust me.
It’s not going to happen. I can pretend that I am working in my air conditioned office until they get wise and push me out the door.
After I left NYS, I decided not to continue in that line of work and consequently did not transfer my credentials elsewhere to keep them active. This turns out to have been a huge miscalculation.
Yup. I dropped my VA law license way back when I moved to another state. Wish I hadn’t. I now have three law licenses, because I’ve kept them from the other state’s I’ve practiced in. It costs a few hundred every year, and I really don’t see any chance I’ll ever need them, but “better to have it and not need it, etc.”
Fuck the full faith and credit clause.
Just reading this is infuriating, let alone having to deal with it.
When I was switching directions in my career a few years ago, I went through a brief, ill-advised phase of considering becoming a high school science teacher. Turns out having a PhD in Physics and several years of experience teaching at the Community College level is not sufficient for a teaching credential. I would have had to go back to school for several prerequisite courses before sitting for a standardized test that would qualify me for a probationary license. Only after working as a student teacher with said probationary license for a year would I then be able to get a full license. That (among myriad other reasons) poleaxed any desire I had for that career.
But remember, regulation is essential for getting the best quality candidates for every position.
And of course, subject matter expertise is not really part of the requirements.
I had the same thought- PhD in chemistry, 6 years of teaching freshman chem, math, and physics, but I found out that I cannot be trusted to teach high school.
I suspect your professional credentials aren’t why they won’t take you.
Just sayin’.
You beat me to it…
I bet what got them spooked is when you asked if it was OK to visit the middle school with your candy mobile.
Don’t laugh- when I, as a young post-doc, interviewed for a professorship at a small teaching college , they asked me to give a lecture on my research to a class of undergrads. In the front row was a very attractive young woman with a deeply unbuttoned blouse and impressive endowments. She kept staring at me and leaning forward through the whole lecture. I exercised discipline and didn’t stare or pop an obvious boner.
I am 99.8% certain that this was a test.
Don’t laugh
Why would I laugh at a tragedy?
(No disrespect, Mrs. OMWC!)
Much better to have an education major that spent four years learning about social justice agitation techniques teaching math to your kid.
Teacher pay scales with education. Since most parents aren’t demanding terminal degrees for high school, why the hell would a district pay for a PhD when they could have a masters degree holder for much less.
That having been said, in high school our Latin and Greek teacher had a PhD in Classics.
I give that advice to undergrads who are thinking of getting an MA in History – get a job first, THEN get the MA.
That’s the thing; I was willing to work for much less than I could make in private industry because I actually enjoy teaching. The premium for having a terminal degree was a pittance vs. a master’s degree, but I didn’t care. The licensing requirements (on top of mandatory union membership and associated statist horseshit) were what deterred me.
So I sold out and now I swim around in my money pit like Scrooge McDuck while masturbating with fists of hundred dollar bills.
And that’s exactly why the teachers’ union has engineered the system to keep people like you out.
Bingo
…while masturbating with fists of hundred dollar bills.
Note to self: Don’t snort coke with Q.
It was probably the failed background check.
The sex offenders registry strikes again?
Yep, same for me. I teach college-level history but can’t teach in high school.
Man, if only Congress was focused on liberalizing licensure laws rather than the Red Menace.
I mean, they can justify just about any intrusion into state and private business with recourse to the Commerce Clause, but for some reason, needlessly overbroad licensure restrictions aren’t a restraint on trade. A man consuming the wheat he grows on his property is nonetheless subject to federal regulations, but trade groups enjoying veto power over applicants is dandy. Okay.
Calling back to the morning thread, licensing laws are higher on my list than immigration laws.
They are the bigger threat to America.
And as you see in Europe, the borders have been flung wide open, but the immigrants and refugees can’t get jobs because they ain’t got credentials and can’t afford the 3 years (and cash) to get them.
“In Czechoslovakia we are brain surgeons. But in America we must be salesmen for decorative bathroom fixtures.”
I suspect most of the recent “refugees” need a lot more than three years of higher ed to be anything other than un- or semi- skilled labor.
And average salary for a high school teacher is 1/3rd of my current salary. I have no idea what a 1st year teacher makes. I’m pretty sure that spending 12 grand to be able to make 30 grand year for four or fives years is bad economics.
How about a private school?
This was just a wee bit of contingency planning.
Minimum age to start collecting pension and social security is 62. Lots of engineers bail out and take a break before going back to work as a contract engineer. I have considered the option, but don’t plan to go that way. Maximum benefits pay out if you retire at age 70. That’s probably what I am going to do. Indoor work with no heavy lifting (See Bob Dole) and a really good salary. I am staying put and not moving away at retirement. So there is no reason to stop coming into the office and getting paid.
The teaching thing was one part contingent planning and one part stop-bitching-go-fix-the problem.
Average teacher salary in Chicago is about $80k. 9 months with numerous days off, 6 hours a day, amazing benefits, early retirement. Shit, I was a sucker not to go that route.
But you have to be a city resident and pay insane city taxes. And you have to buy your own Kevlar.
And the only openings are in Englewood and Roseland.
It would give you a lot of opportunities to put those Krav Maga skills to the test.
And it’s Chicago, so as long as you’re not shtupping the kids you’re bulletproof.
And that may very well be tested with real bullets.
Average high school teacher in Iowa is 50K or so. Of course that includes all rural districts and the metro districts.
Christ, just reading that got me all agitated.
I have been blessed with the small biz bug. I’ve never even worked in a medium sized company. Credentialism in my world is simple: can you do the job?
Thanks for writing this up and reminding me why I never took that job at Honeywell 26 years ago!
^this, it’s why I can sit here and read the Glibs, Small biz is Fun, I have a lot of freedom, and now,
I am free do go do Service Calls,
Cheers!
Since I left NYS, I’ve only worked for small businesses and small non-profits, or run my own businesses. It seems as if that might continue!
Fun fact: I ran across my ACT scores this weekend going thru some old stuff in my parents basement.
What dija get?
Got high and then got a 24. Fell asleep on part of it. Not proud, but true.
And look where you ended up! So embarrassed you had to run across the Pacific to escape the shame!
Good thing he found a home where shame has no cultural significance.
31. I choked the math portion. I should have maxed it out.
I never used those scores, GT was an SAT only school at the time.
(make ennio morricone whistle sound)
https://twitter.com/ReutersUS/status/1021789548764966912
Yay!!
And they couldn’t help but editorialize by the 2nd paragraph.
Reply:
“Methinks @davidhogg111 is going to have a bad day”
Also: second pro-gun decision to come from the 9th Circus in a week? Did Trump put something in the water?
Maybe the court realized armed resistance to the Donadolph Trumputin is only possible if the resistance is, you know, armed.
From the Article: life has been punctuated by a steady stream of mass shootings.
It’s sad how that gets mentioned, but there are no mentions of any self defense cases.
I open carry (OC) without a permit (one of the few things Virginia gets right). I’ve had very few problems and quite a few positive interactions with people.
Maybe because I speak English I cannot see any way to justify a permit for OC.
“life has been punctuated by a steady stream of mass shootings”
Life has been punctuated by a steady stream of government atrocities. Time to abolish government.
KY state constitution specifically guarantees open carry in the opening bits. So this changes nothing, but nice to have the Federal backstop (I know, only 9th circuit at this point).
Iowa does not allow open carry inside the borders of any incorporated town or city. Open carry is only allowed in the countryside. Iowa also prohibits loaded weapons inside vehicles anywhere. So the Permit to Carry Dangerous Weapons is not a concealed carry permit per se. It allows open or concealed carry in town/city limits and in vehicles. It also allows one to carry automatic-opening knives and knives with blades longer than 4 inches. We have weird laws.
The 2nd part sucks, but the first part is good.
The State Supremes shut down an Owensboro law banning open carry in their parks based on this.
NH’s constitution is quite clear:
Open carry was always allowed and local regulations were preempted by the state constitution. As of last year, the right to concealed carry without a license was recognized by legislation.
But my favorite is no knife laws, so I can carry my katana in its sheath (unsheated would be “brandishing”, of course) on my hakama as I go about my daily business.
@kinnath
Ya, Iowa laws are weird.
Can’t carry on the State Fair Grounds, but you can carry into the Capitol building.
I’m still a bit unsure about which sorts of ‘school’ type places and grounds are deemed off limits beyond K-12
The ruling by a three-judge panel on the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals
and just like the earlier ruling from last week at the 9th Circus, this will be reversed en banc.
In a split two-to-three decision
2-3 decision by a three-judge panel.
*sigh*
well, it is fucking Reuters.
Didn’t the entire 9th circus last year say the exact opposite?
And if so, wouldn’t this panel have had to accept that?
I guess one must find the text of the ruling
Ok, ya RTFR explains everything
http://cdn.ca9.uscourts.gov/datastore/opinions/2018/07/24/12-17808.pdf
The panel acknowledged that while the concealed carry
of firearms categorically falls outside Second Amendment
protection, see Peruta v. County of San Diego, 824 F.3d 919,
939 (2016) (en banc), it was satisfied that the Second
Amendment encompasses a right to carry a firearm openly
in public for self-defense.
High School Guidance secretary? Lucky you, your high school still exists.
During all this, I found out that there is (another) legal requirement that the records need to be kept *somewhere* for 60 years!
Let me guess, SP, this institution is either a public flagship university (or at least a satellite campus of one) or a tier-1 private school, right? It’s this crazy shit that drives non-trads into the loving online arms of my employer.
It is a public institution, yes.
Definitely not a flagship or Tier 1.
Still, the public tells me all I need to know.
Steve Smith?
“Required tests and/or immunizations for healthcare programs,”
Didn’t encounter this until I moved to my current job. Interestingly, there is no requirement for new faculty or staff to prove they have immunizations.
I never thought about that, but yeah.
You know the best part of levying tariffs?
Getting to hand out money to your cronies!
He’s taking to politics like a duck to water!
Kid’s a natural, I tell ya!
Alternate take – gee, who knew that a NYC real estate developer would be so skilled at graft?
1) Create tariffs
2) Hand out money to those hurt by tariffs
3) ????
4) PROFIT!
Cant’ fuck with the great plains and the rust belt and still expect to get re-elected in 2020 (or hold the house in 2018).
Ethanol mandates now, ethanol mandates forever!
Now the image of “farmers” is the old wrinkly white guy in overalls and a rusty Ford truck working his 40 acres.
The reality is sweet, sweet tax dollars going right into the pocket of Archer Daniels Midland executives.
Major Major Major Major’s father would like a word.
I’m an old wrinkly white guy in overalls and a rusty Ford Truck and 40 acres. Where’s my damned check? Oh, you said Working.
This Kafka shit makes knocking tin for a living seem preferable to finding a profession. All they want to know is whether you’ll show up in the morning not not get too drunk during lunch.
“knocking tin”
I’ve never heard this slang term for male prostitution before, but you learn something new every day.
If there were licensing requirements for being a gigolo, what would they be?
I imagine calipers and a ruler would be involved.
Hamster Handling license?
*whips out the measuring tape*
I never did give nothing to the tin man.
That he didn’t, didn’t already have
What credentials do I need so I can read Wikileaks like Chris Cuomo?
Be the member of a corrupt, political crime family.
To really read it like Chris Cuomo first you would need an IQ reduction.
They’re not gonna take over our universities! We’ll show those slants who’s boss!
https://www.thecollegefix.com/bulletin-board/asian-americans-are-showing-people-how-absurd-affirmative-action-is/
I graduated from high school in the early 1980s
You don’t have to lie to us, we know you weren’t even born yet in the 1980s.
The CPAsshat credential in my state requires 120 hours of higher education to sit for the exam (only around 50 hours in asshat and business classes). The remaining 70 hours can be in whatever the fuck you want, as long as you also have a college degree…in whatever. Even after you pass the exam (which will set you back around $1,000), you still need 150 hours total in order to receive your piece of paper, in addition to 2,000 hours of actual on the job time.
For me, after I already had my asshat degree I took CLEP exams in sociology and psychology, while also taking community college classes health 101, criminal justice 101, public speaking 101, and another class I can’t even remember at this point. All to get that paper.
And yet, you persisted!
It is amazing to me what is required in various fields. I have a hard time thinking of any that are just left alone. Maybe grocery store checker, although here, I think those are union, so.
And still persist I suppose. Every two years I need 80 hours of CPE to keep my license active. 4 of those hours have to be in an ethics course.
Lawyers of course, require 0 hours in continuing education and ethics to maintain their licenses.
Lawyers have no ethics.
Well, you know, they only mess with people’s lives, not their finances. LOLOLOLOLOL. I crack myself up.
Lawyers of course, require 0 hours in continuing education and ethics to maintain their licenses.
I’ve never had a law license (and I’ve had four so far) that didn’t require both continuing ed and ethics. Generally around fifteen hours per year of general CLE, and one or two hours a year of ethics.
Ah, according to whatever I just googled, 46 states do require CLE…Maryland is one of the 4 that does not.
If we didn’t employ 25 slugs to push paper and collect fees for every productive person what would those worthless people do? Panhandle?
Strangely enough, even with record-low unemployment, the freeway ramp panhandlers seem as numerous as ever.
Could it be, just listen to me for a second as crazy as it sounds, that *whispering* they don’t actually want jobs?
Nevermind, that’s impossible, they’re just being held down by the man and need some more public assistance. After all, we’re just one government program away from utopia!
It really is tragic that four out of five panhandlers are wounded vets.
Yeah, the other day one that was about 30 years old told me he served in Vietnam.. I took my $5 back and told him to at least claim he was Agent Orange and part of Special Forces if he is going to do that Eddie Murphy skit.
In all seriousness, Veteran homelessness is on the decline. The VA has a few figures at this link. Take them for what you will. The most likely reason for the decline is there are simply fewer Vets that there were 30 years ago.
That could only be due to Trump, such an outrageous decision would never have happened in the past.
The exit ramp on my commute several years ago always had panhandlers in the morning. If you pulled up to the right spot, you could get a photo with five or six now hiring signs in the background.
That tweet (or maybe it was a DU comment) someone posted yesterday complaining that we fetishize work really struck a nerve. A nation of panhandlers this idiot wants.
About once a year the Houston paper will run a thing on this. Lots of those guys make $500-$1000 in unreported cash money. Its a good gig if you can stand it.
I support hydroelectric power, but any big federal infrastructure program makes me skeptical.
http://dailycaller.com/2018/07/24/trump-hydroelectric-dams-bills/
damn
reworked: “I guess you just don’t give a damn”
JFC.
1 greater than KFC
(you should Tweeter this to Senator Shoshana)
Her fee is rather steep.
Damn, I’m sorry to hear that SP. I am having the exact opposite experience at fairly nice university doing entirely distant learning. So far the school has been almost weirdly accommodating and helpful.
My company’s HR department on the other hand is pulling this credentialism and obstructionism bullshit (my reason for going back to school).
The college I attend recently shuffled the curriculum schedule and I don’t think realized they are shorting third semester classes and may have to eat the loss to keep the degree program afloat. My classes next term have all of six students registered…
I had a class where I was one of two students. The class was an elective for a major, so it had to be offered at least one every two years. Three people signed up, so they had to teach the course.
Cheeky three-way?
Not exactly.
Automata Theory.
That’s crazy. Sounds like someone majorly screwed up.
I’m not sure what happened. The classes I’m in now are a fusion of second and fourth term students, and we number about twenty. I checked registration again, still only six students signed up for next term. So I’m guessing it’s going to be a transitional period and fourth term will mix us back in with earlier terms. I hope.
It’s not a hugely popular program in any event.
I keeled over dead, of apoplexy, about a quarter of the way through that.
I am sorry I can’t help you, either. You and Warty are both beyond my nonexistent credential.
SP, you can always remind that they’re discriminating against your lived experience.
Why didn’t I think of that?!
I am sorry I can’t help you, either. You and Warty are both beyond my nonexistent credential.
It’s okay. We all know it’s better to be dead than to have been resuscitated by an uncredentialed scab.
Of course. It’s morally imperative that you* do what’s right for society, whether it be sending your kids to a failing public school or refusing to accept help from a health care worker without the correct paperwork.
*You, meaning you personally, and not necessarily me or my friends. /prog
Mumps (proof of two) $78
I have no need for any mumps vaccinations because I actually had the mumps as a kid. Measles too. Oh, and chicken pox.
The only one I didn’t have was Rubella.
*marks down EAP for shingles vaccine sales pitch*
Exactly. I am old enough to have had all those.
However, I am pretty sure I did not have rubella, which will mean getting the MMR series, which, obviously, has two things I don’t need. And takes several weeks in between injections.
So, my plan is to only pay for the rubella titre, and just get the injections. Thereby saving the cost of the measles and mumps titres.
I highly suggest contracting TB. No more skin test for me!
Just reading that I wanted to break things and hurt people. All the hoops with limited availability and no appointments allowed is a real tell. This whole thing exists for the benefit of the people running it. And heaven forbid they should have to put out any effort.
Makes you sympathize with the folks who want to burn it all down, no?
Whoever made the bet the other day, you can collect your winnings.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/trader-joes-shooting-chief-police-bullet-killed-employee-melyda-corado/
Chief: Police bullet killed Trader Joe’s employee during L.A. gun battle
Needs more passivity & even less ownership.
They’ve matched the bullet to a gun, and that means to a cop. So they know the name of the shooter. Why not tell us?
And what a bad shoot, too. You’re blazing away at someone who has noncombatants “in close proximity”? Sounds negligent to me, as in “manslaughter”.
No kidding. The way the news article spins it as officers were shot at so they it was mandatory for them to return fire, without regard for what was behind the target (assuming they actually aimed rather than just reflexively fired in the general direction). Yet not a single officer was shot. I’m also guessing that as soon as the criminal started shooting, the officers (if they did’t beforehand) sought cover first rather than continuing to advance & engage the criminal.
“That was her baby,” Hayward told the station. “He can’t be in his right mind.[…] What’s going on? What made you do this?”
The gun. Duh.
I ran that through google translate — Chief: One of our officers committed negligent homicide, but the union has his back.
I need to start me one of these sex cults….
And I will put such a nasty bureaucracy together to have male members join, that it is gonna be just me and the ladies!
Based on information obtained during the course of this investigation, since ESP’s founding, Raniere has maintained a rotating group of fifteen to twenty women with whom he maintains sexual relationships. These women are not permitted to have sexual relationships with anyone but Raniere or to discuss with others their relationships with Raniere. Some of the Nxivm curriculum includes teachings about the need for men to have multiple sexual partners and the need for women to be monogamous.
Huh. All I want is one woman, who’s not fat and not crazy, who wants to ride me like a carnival tilt-a-wheel. I know that’s a pretty lofty and unreasonable aspiration.
All I got is one woman, who’s
not fat andnot crazy, who occasionally wants to ride me like a carnival tilt-a-wheel (does annually count?).“teachings about the need for men to have multiple sexual partners and the need for women to be monogamous”
Mathematics, how the fuck does it work?
It doesn’t say that men only need to have women as sexual partners.
Simple: One for me, none for you. One for me, none for you. Repeat as necessary.
You bastards are crazy. One is all I can handle. You think that shit is all shits and giggles? I have some bad news for you. You might want to sit down.
Willy Porter – Tilt-A-Whirl
I just don’t understand what’s in it for the women. This sounds awful.
I heard the guy was shaped like a tuna can, so while he didn’t get in there too deep he scraped the shit out of the sides?
I got nothing after that..
I can’t be the only person who reads that and thinks “Judge Reinhold”
Fugging Rosewood…
That should have been “tilt-a-whirl” but whatever. The basic depraved fantasy is pretty evident.
You call that depraved? HM, would you kindly show this man how depravity works?
this dude is so my tri-state-area fucking bro
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sFTd_Q45xX0
Oh, in other infuriating licensing news, we found out yesterday that we can’t personally catch and relocate the family of skunks that has made our yard their home. We need to *hire* a licensed skunk removal expert who will then kill them.
We aren’t calling anyone about this.
I’m just going to point out that you probably don’t want to mess with a skunk. Do you have
MexicansMigrant Workers available at Home Depot?Where the hell do you live? The one time I had a rabid raccoon here in the People’s Republic of Connecticut, I called animal control where they told me if it was dead they would come get it, but not otherwise….. SOOOOO… That was followed by a loud BLAM! And me saying “It is dead now, so come get it..”. They then told me to throw it in the trash cause I was scary.
That stinks (it had to be said…).
Great piece!
Reminds me of the fact that Navy wants me to resubmit my college transcripts if I want them to show up on my updated Navy records….even though there is a literal copy of my transcript in my digital record from when I was commissioned – the same pdf, same format, etc. Apparently I need to get another hard copy to mail to them…..
Somehow I am not surprised by this.