Avast!
The Pink Pirate was born of a combination of intolerance and boredom. The intolerance part comes from Mrs. Dean: there is a fairly short list of liquors that she can tolerate without headaches and just kinda weird side-effects. Tequila fell off of her short list a few months ago, so she’s basically down to rum, rye whiskey, and beer. Effin’ tragic, I tells ya.
Thus, the boredom: Her cocktail rotation was down to three or four drinks. I needed a new recipe, and for some reason was fixated on working cranberry juice into a cocktail. After surprisingly little experimentation, the Pink Pirate was born.
This is a summer drink for getting people hammered in a hurry – the dry of the cranberry juice, the tart of the lime juice, and the heat/sweet of the ginger beer syrup all work together to make a dangerously drinkable libation. Since we invented this one, we get to name it, and between the party-pink color of the final product and the rum, the Pink Pirate was born.
Pink Pirate
3 oz. white rum (Flor de Cana)
1 ¼ oz. cranberry juice (unsweetened, not the cranberry juice cocktail)
¾ ounce lime juice
Ginger beer (Maine Root or Cock and Bull preferred)
This one can also be made with 1 oz. Pickett’s No. 1 Medium Ginger Beer Syrup and club soda/seltzer instead of ginger beer.
Ginger Beer Recipe:
Pour the rum, cranberry juice, and lime juice over rocks in a highball glass. Top with @ 6 oz. ginger beer. Stir.
Ginger Beer Syrup Recipe:
Pour the rum, cranberry juice, ginger beer syrup, and lime juice into a mixing glass. Mix well – the syrup will need to be stirred or it will separate out. Top with club soda/seltzer to @ 11 oz. total. Pour over rocks in a highball glass.
You could probably throw a lime garnish on it if you want to dress it up a little. Hell, one of those little umbrellas would look right at home on this one.
The kind of white rum you use isn’t terribly important – the rum is backgrounded by the all the other flavors. I did try making this with dark rum, but it just wasn’t as crisp and refreshing.
As ever, cocktailing is all about proportions and balances – feel free to adjust any of the amounts to dial it in to your preference.
And ye better be rememberin’, no drinking and navigating!
Sounds good.
I prefer my drinks genderfluid.
Ewwwwwww
Something about drinking from the Main(e) Root?
That’s a hard question.
I’ll prolly use the cranberry cocktail. Easier to buy in smaller quantities.
I think that would make it too sweet (for me). The ginger beer adds sweetness already, and I like the dry of the cranberry juice.
But why not? Give it a go!
This. I can’t remember who mentioned it, but I have been doing vodka/cranberry with Knudsen just cranberry and top it off with a bit of soda water. Nice and dry and just a few grams of sugar.
An excellent compliment to the GlibFit post, for those of us who fell off the wagon or were never on the wagon to begin with.
*salutes*
If I knew there was a wagon to ride on, I might have been interested in joining in.
I am reminded of the bottle of white rum that’s been sitting on my table, unopened, for months. I got it to see if the barrel-free variety was more agreeable than aged rum.
Why haven’t I opened the bottle yet?
I don’t want to sound like a drunk, but that doesn’t happen at my house.
Because white encompasses the entire light spectrum while beige is more up your ally?*
*generalizations are fun
Answer: The bottle smelled of flavor.
Good barrel aged rum is as good as a good bourbon. At least the cachaca variety of rum is.
Oh, hell yeah. I’ve recommended it before, but the Ron Zacapa 23 Solera Rum is just divine. One of the best sipping liquors I have ever had, period, full stop.
Pink Pirate is just another example of rape culture,
Tasty, though.
When I name a new drink, its usually after the drink has been invented. If I were to start with the name, what would go into a STEVE SMITH?
I’m thinking I’d start with a junipery gin, to get that woodsy vibe. What else?
No roofies allowed.
It should include some sort of painkiller. What STEVE SMITH does to a man is very painful.
It should include some sort of painkiller.
Did you miss the gin part?
Absinthe, for a nice green color.
It does make the heart grow fonder.
*narrows gaze*
*looks tipsy*
Something red, to represent the blood that pours from your anus after a visit from STEVE SMITH.
Kind of “French 75″ish?
I had one of those. I was a little concerned by how much I liked it.
It is a grand drink. First time I had one was at a place in Philly, that was France 1912 or so themed. I laughed at the name, and asked the young woman bartending if she knew what it meant…she did not. I explained quickly, and asked if I would feel like I took a cannon shot to the head after a couple of them. I got a polite chuckle (I tip well).
http://cocktaildudes.com/recipe/slow-dancing-sasquatch/
Sasquatch
1 ounce Rittenhouse Rye
1 ounce Laird’s Apple Jack brandy
3 droppers Bar Keep brand apple spice bitters
½ ounce “Smoked Brown Sugar Syrup”
Serve this drink stirred with a cinnamon stick over large cubes of ice or garnished with fresh or dried slices of apple.
To make “Smoked Brown Sugar Syrup,” dissolve 2 cups of dark brown sugar in 2 cups of hot water. Add one teaspoon of liquid smoke.
Makes one serving.
STEVE SMITH APPROVE AND BY APPROVE MEAN DRINK BEFORE RAPE EVERYONE.
small portions of heroine dust
I’ve never been able to get one dry enough to grind into a fine powder. What’s his secret?
I haven’t watched the show…so I am not 100% sure what the heck Big Lez is talking about.
They step on it with molly.
NOTHING GO INTO STEVE SMITH; STEVE SMITH GO INTO EVERYTHING! YOU KNOW WHAT “GO INTO” MEAN RIGHT? IT MEAN RAPE
What happens if you drink this:
I was allowed on the furniture even when I didn’t have a Pink Pirate on board.
Pfft, Pink Pirate is so gay it wraps around back to straight.
While still maintaining its fabulousness.
It’s possible to be straight and fabulous!
Probably.
In theory.
Wait, I think Nathan Fillion from his Firefly days would pull it off.
Nathan Fillion’s turn as the disembodied head Gary in Santa Clarita Diet cracks me up.
That frog has fur
Mickelson goes 5-5-5 thru Amen Corner. Not a good result.
Lachowsky family secret drink recipe. Named for my Uncle Frank, who invented it
The Franquilizer consists of-
1, 16 ounce glass filled with ice
1/2 ounce of club soda
1/2 ounce of tonic water
lime wedge
splash of bitters
Fill the rest of the glass with gin and enjoy.
Damn, that is aptly named. I’m not sure I could make it through half of that drink without falling asleep.
It’s pretty ridiculous. I’ve asked him many a time why he doesn’t just drink it straight from the bottle.
Whoa…
The last line could be replaced with “Drink gun directly from the bottle while glancing at the glass”
*drink gin
stupid autoerror
The former works just as well.
I’m sure this is very popular in West Hollywood. And at OMWC’s House.
And at OMWC’s House.
Aren’t wine coolers along with Chris Hanson the standard?
He likes to change it up now and then. Umbrella enhanced cocktails and ABBA are in the mix as well.
The Pittsburgh Pink Pirates.
Why not? They play like it.
Detroit vs. the White Sox game was a hard one to watch yesterday. We were up ahead of Detroit in the bottom of the 8th and they suddenly got some life into them and beat us.
@#$%!!!!
/Swiss yelling at car radio last night
Chicago Pink Sox.
Ed, hold the muppet here. I’m going to get a bat…
Make sure you use a Sox bat and not a crappy Cub’s bat. Be careful though…I heard Rufus packs a baby seal club.
The correct term is “Sox of Color”.
That stupid play in left field was the difference.
Dark rum + cranberry cocktail + Barq’s root beer = poxy dockside whore
That’s a nice name. I’ve drank all sorts of crazy stuff like that. Way back when dinosaurs roamed the earth and mostly hillbillies roamed the earth… or maybe it was just the part of earth I inhabited at the time, this one crazy mofo I knew, he was older than me and sort of the hardass drinking type. Anyway, one day he shows up at my place and says ‘we’re gonna drink some motor oil! It’s put some hair on yer ass!’. He talked just like that. Anyway, I had some friends over at the time and we were cooking out in my backyard. And this crazy fuck pours something into 2 very large shot glasses, downs one of them and hands the other to me. It looked exactly like motor oil, seriously. So I’m standing there with this stuff and everyone is staring at me, especially crazy guy. And I know I have to drink this stuff right now or I’ll be a giant pussy. So I downed it. Hmm, not really very tasty, but I was relived I didn’t think it had real motor oil in it. Turned out to be coke and lime flavored (and colored) vodka. Crazy times those were.
Don’t stick it in crazy and don’t drink with crazy.
In Okinawa, since we were in a tropical place my buddy and I liked a tropical drink. The girls who tended bar at the karaoke bar we used to go to called it the Timmy Typhoon for my friend. It was similar to a Hurricane but a little different – Southern Comfort, coconut rum, pineapple juice and grenadine. It’s probably an actual drink but I don’t know what it’s called. Girly? Damn right, but delicious. Mojos were a popular choice at the bars in Oki, too.
Damn right. Fruity sweet drinks are best for the hot weather. Besides, I can throw together gin and tonic. If I’m going to pay someone for my drinks, I want them to work for it.
And ye better be rememberin’, no drinking and navigating!
Pfft, if Magellan had thought so, we’d still be beholden to the Portuguese interests.
He never had to deal with a MADD patrol…
(Monarchies Against Drunk Decks)
DAMM has a pretty good website. worth visiting a time or two.
Thing about nanny bots like that, they’re really full on prohibitionists. The drunk driving thing is only a cover. Now they’re trying to get to a BAC of no greater than zero law for driving. It’s absurd. I remember reading that article and the writer had made a comment something like ‘Do you know how much a large male can consume and still be under the .08 limit? They could drink 6 beers and still be under it!’. OMG, the fucking horror! Anyone think they would stop at zero tolerance laws for driving? No way, next it will be trying to monitor people’s alcohol consumption from purchases and then on to inspect homes to make sure no children are in a house where there is liquor. Evul fucking shitheads.
It’s the same with any big organized to combat (fill in the blank) They never stop once their mission is accomplished. There too many people getting rich off MADD for them to close up shop and say, well done. They have to continue to fight against something to keep the checks coming in.
Can they at least change their mission to Mothers Against Dick Durbin?
You mean the M doesn’t stand for…
Ah, fuck it.
“rye whiskey, and beer”
I could suffer through that.
I want one bourbon, one shot and one beer.
Sounds good to me.
She be hollerin’ bout the front rent, she be lucky to get any back rent
She ain’t gettin’ none of it.
And out the door I went…
So I be talkin to my friend and ask can I stay with you
And he said, I have to talk to my wife, she kinda funny
And I said, yeah, everyone funny, now you funny too
Said look man
Come down here
He got down there
Say “What you want?”
Jumpin’ George was my first concert. Went with my dad and three of my uncles when I was ten. What I remember most about the show – we had seats on the floor maybe 2/3s back from the stage. The balcony overhang was right over us. The two rows in front of us were occupied by a big group of bikers. Real bikers, not orthodontists who wear vests and ride a Harley on the weekend. Someone from the balcony started throwing lit cigarettes down and they were hitting the bikers. The bikers stood up basically in unison and filed out. About five minutes later, they returned. No more cigarettes raining down.
Saw George and Johnny Winter on a Sunday night back in high school. First class the next morning I realized I could not hear.
Good thing Nugent wasn’t there too, your ears would have been bleeding.
I probably wouldn’t have noticed the blood, it was raining buckets when the show let out at 2AM. At least the car had vinyl seats.
4th row at a Van Halen show = one week of deafness.
My first concert was during Pink Floyd’s Division Bell tour. My father was/is a huge fan and towed me along for the experience, for which I’m eternally grateful.
My only disappointment was the lack of flying pigs. They were more along the lines of inflatable pigs grooving in unison to the beat of the song while the upper half of their bodies were jutting out from the sides of the stage’s set.
What, no scotch?
That could be the shot – Mr. Thorogood was not specific.Dammit, blew the lyrics – you are correct.
“One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer”
+1 drink ain’t enough, man, ya better make it three
I’ll take 2 Pina colodas. One for each hand.
That does sound good. The pink thing. I use a lazier recipe myself *opens bottle of beer, puts 2 ice cubes in glass and pours in whiskey of choice*
I know, pouring four things into a glass before drinking is a lot to ask.
And you even have to use measured amounts of each. It’s like slavery or something. And you just cannot trust your orphans with expensive bottles of booze.
Pouring your own drinks is literally genocide.
Make ENB pour them for you.
*frantically attempts to doxx Ted S.*
/ENB
And you just cannot trust your orphans with expensive bottles of booze.
Two word, my monocled friend:
Shock. Collar.
That makes your drink get all fizzy.
You put it on the orphan, not the booze. Geez.
In the spirit of BrettL’s comment upthread, it’s not that I have a hard time mixing drinks, it’s that once there’s booze and something mixer-ish in a glass it’s hard to not think I’m already done. Kind of like when kids make cookies and never get past the part where there’s sweet dough in a bowl with a spoon.
Reason #2673 why I drink traditional screwdrivers.
1.5 oz Vodka
0.5 oz SoCo
0.5 oz Sloe Gin
0.5 oz Galliano
Fill with OJ
Sloe Comfortable Screw Against the Wall
/former bartender
Never drink sticky liquor in a bar. (SoCo, and Sloe Gin are prime examples) especially in summer. No matter what pour-spouts you use it becomes a fruit fly grave yard almost immediately.
/also former bartender
Since it’s a booze topic, I picked up another bottle of rye yesterday, it’s the Sagamore Spirit Double Oak. If it’s as good as the Barrel Select, I’ll be happy with it.
booze related. It’s Friday and I have only 5 hours til work is over. It’ll be a 24oz modela for the drive home today.
I don’t remember the last time I had a mixed drink. I have a cellar full of fine wines, mead, cider, and sour ales. I don’t need anything else.
Semi related: I had a couple of blood orange negronis as an aperitif last weekend. First time I’ve had it and I enjoyed them very much. Was going to post the ingredients but I didn’t get a clear picture unfortunately.
Speaking of which, whatever happened to Sweatin Gin? He was also Count Negroni right? Is that the same person as Negroni Please?
Putting sugar into alcohol may taste good, but is the key to a bad hang-over.
It is why wine hang-overs are so nasty.
Bourbon and Branch is the preferred mixed drink when having more than two.
You…dilute bourbon?!
MONSTER!
A splash of water isn’t exactly “diluting”. Hell, even the most fanatical single malt drinkers put a splash in.
The real offense is calling bourbon and branch a mixed drink.
That’s normally about as far as I’ll mix it.
2 ice cubes and a double shot. Some like neat, but for me, the water brings out the flavor more.
Its odd, but I haven’t had a hangover in years and years. My daily tipple (usually a cocktail with 3 oz or so of booze, and then a nightcap which is honestly another 3 oz) just doesn’t cross the line, even when it gets the weekend supplement (happy hour comes early on weekends, so its two cocktails, plus the nightcap). And as you know from the COTW recipes I have posted, I am not averse to a sweeter cocktail. I just don’t drink wine, and don’t drink beer that often anymore.
It may be that I never use sugar per se in cocktails, but only agave syrup, fruit juices or honey.
I’d say you’re not stressing the system enough at that amount to get into real hang-over range.
It usually averages out to about 2 oz of liquor per hour. A BAC calculator tells me that I’ll be at about .05 BAC. Which isn’t very high, but it sure feels like more than that by the time I head for bed.
I had one day after Saint Patricks. I decided to drink some of that Guiness draught with the metal ball in the can. Do not drink that shit or you will pay twice for it. But I rarely get a hangover. If I drink a lot I just feel a little spacey and tired the next morning. Also, I only drink beer or whiskey straight these days. Vodka, gin, I like it and no hangover either. I would get a hangover on wine if I would drink enough of it, but there’s no chance of that happening, I don’t like it in any way.